August 7, 2014

not a piece of cake

I love my job. I love my co-workers. I even love to bake them cakes ;)

The place that tests my patience more than anywhere else in my life is at work.

If you work at a teaching hospital, you know what I mean.

I was particularly struggling this week . . . with new med students, new interns and a new fellow in the unit. Take a busy day in the ICU, add a bunch of new and different personalities, plus other stressors . . . and things start to get complicated. 

Anywho, I caught myself becoming impatient, irritated and frustrated. In the moment, I tried to dissect these feelings and get to the bottom of it all - why am I feeling this way? 

There were a lot of stressors, but what I really needed was some perspective. Who am I working for? Do I truly care that this person is looking at me like I'm an idiot? Whose opinion of me truly matters?

I had to remind myself of a couple truths.

1. God extended grace and patience to me when I was His enemy. Does this move me to extend love to difficult people?

For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son . . . 
- Romans 5:10

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us,  even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved . . .
- Ephesians 2:4-5

2. Who am I working for? I am not working for the approval of man, no matter how many letters are behind their name. I am working for God, and His approval is what truly matters . . . which, because of the gospel, is based in grace, not on my performance. So even when I am grumpy, have a bad day and don't treat people the way I should, His feelings towards me have not changed. 

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men . . .
- Colossians 3:23

For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 
- Ephesians 2:8-9

I still struggled, but having a tiny glimpse of perspective helped me to push through. I have to remind myself daily to keep falling on His mercy and grace! Isn't it funny how, when we ask God to give us patience (or any other good character for that matter), He usually puts us through a trial . . . but it's all to change us and grow us.

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