May 9, 2011

Rolling In The Deep

Sometimes life hits you like a gale force wind straight in the face.

One day, you're straight up chillin' in a green pasture, bored or attempting to be patient with your circumstances . . . and then everything is flipped the next day.

Isn't it funny how not just one thing changes, but almost everything at once? The future freaks me out a little, especially when I can't make out the horizon.

Especially when past mistakes and past experiences haunt this present moment.

I find myself faced with two options when faced with the uncertainty of the future.

I can either allow the fear of failure to take control and paralyze me from moving forward, or I can choose to (very shakily) take a step out in faith (with my eyes squinched closed and teeth clenched) . . .

It's not the absence of fear, but choosing to take action in spite of my fear.

It's making a conscious choice . . . yes, I may make a mistake (and most likely will - I suppose I'm human after all). Looking at a risk and weighing the possibilities. Do I take a chance, knowing the probability of failure, or do I stay static and miss out on life?

Yes, I may very well fall flat on my face and be shattered to pieces. But it's trusting that no matter what tomorrow brings, I am walking with a God who is immensely faithful and has me within His tender loving care. Knowing that no matter what the future holds, it will be OK because He'll give me the grace to handle it. Even when things don't work out.

That He is who He says He is . . . that I can trust Him with my life, that His love will never fail, that He never expects me to be perfect or have it all together - even when I put that pressure on myself.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:35-39

And this is how I choose to live,
As if I'm jumping off a cliff,
Knowing that you'll save me,
Knowing that you'll save me.
And after all the stupid things I did,
There's nothing left there to forgive,
Because you already forgave me.

Every breath that I inhale is followed by exhaling.
Trust the one Who never fails.
I know you will never fail me.
"Life After Death And Taxes" - Relient K

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