January 6, 2014

irrational thoughts

As a woman, I find that it's easy to have irrational thoughts . . . and I know I can't be the only one. We have a way of letting our imaginations run away with us, and things get a little bit out of control.

Yesterday, I found myself convinced that I have reached the pinnacle of my existence. Yup. At 28 years of age, this is it. It's all downhill after this.

One day I will wake up and not have an awesome roommate, I won't have any friends, I will be completely alone, my mind and body will be falling apart and I will have nothing left to give or do.

So, I guess I better cling tight to what I do have now before it all gets taken away.


Thankfully, I woke up today feeling a little more . . . normal.

Also, I was able to realize that there are so many things going wrong when I start to have those thoughts.

First of all, I am making a statement - whether I acknowledge it or not. I am accusing God of not loving me, not being a good Father, not being a provider and not having a plan for my life. I am saying that my way is best, and if I don't get the things I want, my life must be meaningless.

I am also saying that He is not enough. And that my life must not be that great.

As Matt Chandler puts it in this sermon, "Coveting, when all is said and done, is an accusation against God that he doesn't care about you, provide for you, or give you what you need."

I am so thankful that my irrational thoughts and my feelings are not reality. 

God is loving, His mercies are new every day, He is a perfect Father, He is the provider of all my wants and needs . . . (even if I don't get what I want or think I need) . . . He is the only one who can completely fulfill and satisfy.

My life and your life is not measured by the acquisition of things, accomplishments, relationships, what people think of you, or any circumstance. As much as the world tells us that it is.

Scripture says that Jesus came to give us life to the fullest. To give us true life . . . to know and have an eternal relationship with the One who created us and saved us. He is the greatest blessing.

No matter what the future holds, we are called to trust Him, and He is trustworthy. I have to hold onto Him, not my stuff. If He is who He says He is, the Creator of the universe holds us in His hand. Everything has to be OK because we are His. When I think about that, I am able to rest.

addendum: this post on relevant that my sweet roommate just shared with me: Life Won't Begin at Your Next Milestone is super good.  
“The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.” - Elisabeth Elliott

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